Physician -- Oops, mother, heal thyself

So, a few days ago I woke up feeling really crummy. Okay, it started even before I woke up. It started when I woke up the FIRST time, at 3 am, with a burning sore throat and night sweats. Got it? Sure, I know you know that feeling -- you're getting sick, and man, are you excited about it ... NOT!

The day did not proceed much better from there. I felt under the weather most of the day, though I won't deny three ibuprofen helped tremendously and I was able to at least function. (A certain level of functioning was crucial as I had quite a bit of driving to do ...)

By mid-afternoon, I was not faring much better. I had moved from I don't feel really well to Somebody give me the amnesia drug they gave me the in the hospital (AMAZING STUFF) and drop me in either Tahiti or Hawaii with the body I had at 18. Three ibuprofen bounced up to four to take the edge off of a rapidly developing migraine.

Life seemed to be getting worse, moment by moment - especially after realizing how far from that 18 year old body my own had come - so I did what I always do when life gets hard. I ran a warm bath and put on some face mask stuff. (I sometimes feel sorry for men that they don't know about these ways to pamper themselves. Hey, I've watched football to cut the stress, and I've gotta say, it JUST AIN'T THE SAME.)

Finally, somewhere between the ibuprofen and the face mask, I began to feel better -- well enough to keep to my original plans for the evening to enjoy some Thai food with girlfriends. Woohoo!

But I woke up this morning feeling crummy again. And on top of that, I felt mad that I felt crummy. You know the internal drill: "I have so much to do," "I don't have time to be sick," or what about, "It is a BEAUTIFUL day outside -- why do I have to be sick TODAY?" Whine, whine, whine ... let me tell you, I was just filling my house (and head) with loads of positive mental energy.

So, I tried to do a mental shift from such distorted thinking. I asked myself, How would I handle this situation if it were one of my kids that were sick? Without a second thought, I knew I would tell that child to rest and spend the day getting better. Funny, I could give my child permission to do that -- I could even see the necessity of it -- but myself? Oh, my, my -- life can be so full of 'shoulds' and 'should nots'! It was crystal clear to me how distorted my thinking had been!

So, for the past 3 days, I've had lots of practice following this advice. I think I am getting good at it. I do hope I feel better tomorrow, though.

Once in a lifetime

I think every one should have a near-death experience in their life -- at least once.

I am told I almost died December 7. I wouldn't know, as I slept through the whole thing, but that is what everyone told me when I woke up. Turns out I am one of a select -- ahem, special -- group of people who reacts badly to a certain anesthesia. By react badly, I mean, my heart slows down to a ridiculously slow rate, like, 25 bpm. Usually a special person such as myself can be pulled out of this reaction by being given a dose of some other drug especially used for this purpose, but noooo ... turns out I am extra special and needed two doses, and by then - most understandably - the anesthesiologist and surgeon decided I was too special to be operated on that day, most especially by them.

So when I again decide to have my bunions fixed, I will have to go to a MAJOR hospital to have it done, where my specialness can be monitored most carefully. I'm so glad we found this out on some minor elective surgery such as a bunionectomy, and not when I was in a major car accident and had to be put under to be fixed no matter what. This information about myself definitely falls under the category of GOOD TO KNOW.

So what was so great about this experience that everyone should have one? Hmmm ... well, for starters, everyone -- and I mean everyone -- treats you real good for the next 24-48 hours after your near-death experience. (If you're lucky, you might squeeze a whole 72 hours out of such a catastrophe, but my kids are all teenagers and the best I could do was 48 ...). For those 2 days, I definitely felt special -- and, by extension, did my kids as they related the traumatic story to their friends of how THEIR mother had almost DIED ... Another benefit is it gives the 'near-deathee' an entirely new perspective on what is and what is not important in life. This effect, in my case, lasted a full 24 hours before the world came crashing in on me again -- but then, maybe, 24 hours is EXACTLY the length of time it took for the drugs to completely leave my system ...